[We Love Us theme plays]
Lard: "(Sings along then cheers and claps)
Mark: "Very good start to the week on the backing vocals there. We Love Us, radio's toppermost quiz for proper pop stars out of proper pop groups, and all this week we are playing with Radiohead and on the line to us should be Jonny Greenwood. Jonny!
Mark: "How are ya?!
Jonny: "Alright, mate
Mark: "Yeah, good. Now listen, I'm expecting big things of you, because like everybody always comes on this and says “oh, I'm dead sleepy”, you know, and all that, but you get up quite early, don't you?
Jonny: "Yeah, I've been up for a bit, yeah
Mark: "Yeah, there you go. I heard you got up early and went kite flying?
Mark: "Yeah, you do that, don't you? (JG laughs) in the fields around Oxfordshire somewhere, don't you?
Jonny: "If it's windy enough
Mark: "Mmm, alright, yeah, ok. Now then, what's this arm brace you're wearing at the moment? What's that all about?
Jonny: "I've got that...this injury that kind of typists get, and I've got it, bizarrely, and it...
Mark: "You've got what? RSI?
Jonny: "Yeah, something like that
Mark: "Have you?!
Jonny: "Yeah (laughs)
Mark: "Alright, so it's not a kind of rock star affectation when you come in with your arm all lashed up then?
Jonny: "I don't think so, I haven't got a leather one (MR laughs), it's just a sort of medical one
Mark: "(laughs) Right, ok, fair enough then. Are you still going to wear those big headphone things when you play in September?
Jonny: "Yeah, I think so
Mark: "I mean is that an affectation, or do you need those to...have you got hearing difficulties?
Jonny: "Yeah well my ears started bleeding at the end of the last tour...
Jonny: "Which wasn't very cool...
Mark: "Ooooh, god
Lard: "You're not a well bunny, are you?
Jonny: "Not at the moment, no
Lard: "Ohhh, dear
Mark: "You're not cut out for show-business, are you, Jonny?
Jonny: "Maybe I should come and do radio, or something
Mark: "Yeah, that's a doddle, that's the soft option, that'd be absolutely fine. Er...right then, now...actually someone called Adrian has faxed us in, and he's suggested a question, 'cos he reckons he's got the original demo to Creep, he said
Jonny: "Oh, no...
Mark: "I'm not going to ask you it, but do you know... I'm interested in what the original line was instead of “You float like a feather in a beautiful world”
Jonny: "Er, I believe it was something like “shoulder in the pan”
Mark: "Yeah, that's right
Jonny: "“Holding a leg of lamb”
Mark: "Yeah, exactly, he said it was “a leg of lamb, holding a shoulder in the pan”, and this Adrian says he lives near you, and he wants you to win, then he can share the foot-spa
Jonny: "Aw, bless him
Mark: "Ah, but anyway that's not a question, right we're going to go with the real questions now
Jonny: "Go on then
Mark: "Are you ready?
Mark: "Ok then, fair do's, here we go: Which pop chanteuse wrote an article about the band, and stated “I'm the kind of person who had a different favourite song every week. This week it's Fake Plastic Trees. I remember being moved by the video, but the song just left me speechless”, someone wrote that in The Independent, another artiste. Who might that be?
Jonny: "It wouldn't be Alan Morris, would it? Alanis Morissette
Mark: "It would indeed!
Lard: "Yay!!!! (bangs a drum)
Mark: "It would indeed be Alanis Vinaigrette
Mark: "Right, here we go: Now, who did the artwork on your latest single sleeve, Paranoid Android?
Jonny: "Ah, easy. That's Stanley Donwood
Mark: "Stanley Donwood
Lard: "(cheers and plays a drum roll and cymbal crash)
Mark: "Confident, you see they are bright, Radiohead, you see, we're going to have to win five foot-spas
Jonny: "The foot-spa will be mine!
Mark: "(laughs) Right, well you're doing well. Now then, you lost all your gear once, you had all your gear nicked
Mark: "On tour with whom?
Jonny: "Oh, that was during Soul Asylum
Mark: "Soul Asylum
Lard: "Wahey!!! (plays drum roll and crash)
Mark: "They're too easy these, aren't they, Jonny, for you? They're too easy
Jonny: "So far...
Mark: "Now then, Phil, your drummer, what subjects does he have a degree in?
Jonny: "Oooh, good one. Errr...
Jonny: "I believe it's English...
Jonny: "And something...
Jonny: "English, and erm...was it English and erm...Politics? No, it's something like that
Jonny: "From Liverpool
Mark: "Now, I've got English and History
Mark: "It was. Now, I'm going to say no points for that, because we want to leave some competition in this, you're doing very well
Lard: "He's a hard man!
Mark: "Alright, now here's another university question
Mark: "Your Colin, right?
Mark: "What did he write his thesis on, or to put it another way, his dissertation?
Jonny: "I believe it was Willa Cather
Mark: "It was what?
Jonny: "Willa Cather, the American novelist
Mark: "Well, I've got Raymond Carver here
Jonny: "Errr...I don't think that's right
Mark: "You don't think that's right?
Mark: "(laughs) Right ok. Well, we'll have to...right, we'll have to...I'll give you the benefit of the doubt, but we'll check it, don't you worry
Jonny: "Alright, fair enough
Mark: "Don't you worry, we will check that
Jonny: "Alright, mate
Mark: "Alright, so that's three, possibly four, which is pretty good, that's a fighting start, definitely
Mark: "Definitely. Er...right, now then, Lard are you going to play a drum roll there?
Lard: "I was going to do, but well, he didn't do very well towards the end did he? (starts paying drums as he talks) It was a bit of a sort of anti-climax. No offense, like
Mark: "No, that's ok, good, because that is the drum roll, because you've got a question to set for the fantastic listeners, haven't you, Jonny?
Jonny: "I have, yeah
Mark: "Right, and then everybody's going to go and see you play in Barcelona, and we'll have, you know, a shandy, and perhaps a vol-au-vont
Mark: "Right, so what's the first question?
Jonny: "The question is: What's the very last word on the very last song of The Bends?
Mark: "Right, ok. Good question, isn't it? So, the very last word on the very last song of the previous album, The Bends. Alright, then, so you have to collect the answers all week, each member's going to set one, and well, everybody knows, I'm patronising everybody...well it's obvious what's happening, isn't it?
Mark: "It's obvious. Right, what have you got planned for today, Jonny?
Jonny: "Oh, I've got to do lots of interviews with scary French magazines
Mark: "Ooooh, oh have you? Right, ok, well best of luck to get through that, and we will see you in Barcelona
Mark: "Alright then. Jonny Greenwood from Radiohead, thanks very much indeed
Jonny: "See you then
Lard: "(cheers and claps)
Mark: "See ya! So as I say, a question each day, collect them all and write them down and send them all in, if you're over eighteen, you could go to Barcelona
(We Love Us theme plays)
Lard: "(sings along)
Mark: "Tight as a dog's bottom on the backing vocals, and here are Radiohead
[plays Paranoid Android]